Thursday, October 11, 2012

Brutally Beloved




*Collaboration b/w Soul Quest (Justin Toney) and Alfreda Ghee*

Soul Quest 

The blood on my bruised knuckles seems foreign,
I don’t know why you lay limp on the floor. 
I…I blacked out…
oh my God, it happened again.
Did my fists become your attackers? 
I just burn up inside so much it explodes,
having flashbacks of bombs gunfire death.
My grizzly rage freaks out when I’m traumatically stressed.

I view you as the enemy,
I’m just protecting my camp, as I was trained.
You charged and screamed at me, marking my face with scars,
so tackled you onto the living room glass table,
then I planted my own pain upon you.
I..I’m so sorry baby, 
I didn’t take my medicine today,
that fifth of brandy is drained to bottom.
You know they fired me at the factory 7 months ago, 
and no one wants to hire screwed up Iraq war vet.
I know you look at me like I’m crazy. 


Why does fear and hate mask your face?
Don’t you know I love you woman?
What? You going to leave me
after all I sacrificed ?
I traded my friends, my family, my career, my life...
Baby get up, come over here. 
I said bring yo a…see you’re testing my nerves.
That’s why I talk with my hands, because you shut down my words.

Alfreda Ghee

Coming to lying on the floor
Eyes half closed, lips burst and swollen
My body sore
This can't be happening again
Not now
Why me Lord
Why Oh Why Me
What the heck am I doing down this road again

The skin under my nails
Falling from the palms of my hands
I should have plucked your eyes out one by one
Grabbed the gun and put one in your head
Silly me, I forgot we tossed it
Wooden bat beating you across your back
So hard it split in two
Not knowing what to do
So I swing harder and harder
Man stop acting like a B...
Take it like a man should

You aren't going to keep bleeding me
Beating me up side my head
I'm tired of taking these beatings
Not standing my ground
Times are changing
Don't you see how it's raining
You're off your meds
That doesn't stop you from taking this knife
In your chest
Deep, deeper and deeper that it pierces your heart
You blamed me for your getting fired
I'm way past tired and supporting your a**
The look in your eyes say kill this B****
I'm half past crazy and half dead already

It's not fear and hate that hides my face
It's survival, kill or be killed
Love doesn't feel like this
Pain every time I turn around
Me beating your head to the ground
Yeah, i'm leaving your sorry behind
Taking the kids with me
I just have to find a way 
To get out that door
What are you looking for now

Oh no you don't 
You looking for this right
We fought all over the house
Seeing who would have the strength
To come out on top
Stop it stop it was all I heard
Then fear struck my soul
Pow pow pow
Now your body is lying dead on the floor
Come on kids lets get out of here
Before the cops come
Run run babies 
I can't do this anymore
Your 9 year old son put two bullets to your body
To protect his mom.....


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